Back on track, or at least on my way to finding that track

Can't believe I've abandoned this place for a year and a 1/12...

Where do I start...? It's like nothing really happened yet everything's changed. It's like a long sleep in the castle only to be waken by my very self. Not a knight in a shiny armor, not a strike of lightening, not even a sweaty nightmare or a pain in the stomach - but my very own mind. Is that what they call an epiphany? I don't know, what I do know is that I've been settling for things I'm not that passionate about in the name of being a grown-up, while feeling so sick about the very idea of it that I ran away as hastily as I could.

And now here I am, in-between identities, in-between places, in-between relationships, in-between dreams. I wonder is it just me or are we all programmed to have to go through the exact same phase in life?

What I do know is, I've been waiting for what I call a chance - don't even know what for, a change? a shove forward? - for so long, that I tied my hands and knees to the point that I was frozen in time and space, so timid to go anywhere in fear of imperfection, yet so desperate to get the hell out of this daunting current state that I scream constantly in my head "All I want is a chance, anyone? anywhere? anything!"

I feel constantly a thousand words down my throat a million chills on my skin a trillion thoughts in my head a gazillion feelings in my eyes, so overwhelming that I'm stunned and and utterly motionless, on the edge of reaching that tipping point of explosion.

I know this is not right.

And I have to do something about it, come to my own rescue, be my own salvation.

So here I am again, selling all I have on eBay, running away from myself, looking for the new me.

Funny how the journey starts from Yorkshire though, a reality drawback of the stuff I could sell and train tickets I could afford.

I blame it on you, Ebay, but thank you nonetheless.

It feels so good to pack light, and yes I'm not just talking about the suitcase, but my head, too.

fully packed

fully packed, not much could be packed into a 20kg suit case.

Off to London, bye bye UK.

I'll keep updating this blog once I've settled and received my iMac through the post, but it might take a while.

Until then,
Bye for now.

Illustration No.7 The Stretch

<The Stretch>

-another entry of my Red&Blue collection

A little overslept,

Lifted straight form the winter to a bold summer.

With the spring missing,

Got just enough time for a stretch.

Are you ready?

睡久了那么一点点，

就从寒冬跳到盛夏。

错过了春天，

刚够伸一个懒腰的时间。

准备好了吗？

(click on the image for full view)

Illustration No. 6-Lost in the woods, where the trees will guide you home.

lost internet connection for a week, here's what I've been doing, and thinking about.

<Lost in the Woods>

run, 

till the end of the road, 

where there is light, 

and there is hope.

(click on the image for full view)

5th Illustration-red & blue

<Red & Blue>

There's always something worth hoping for.

(click on the image for full-view)

4th Illustration- Shhhh...

3rd Illustration- Lavender Girl

<Lavender Girl>

Come smell it, 

it's purple.

(click on the image for full-view)

2nd Fashion Illustration - Orange Escape

<Orange Escape>

I'm not blind,

I chose not to see,

so that I can feel.

(click on the image for full-view)

2011 Fall RTW-Vivienne Westwood and the Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Remember in Fashion PR class my teacher used to say that, if you spot a neon wire decoration in major store window displays from more than three fashion cities, say, Milan, London, and Tokyo, at the same time, then there might be a trend in neon wire decorations going on for store window display decos.

A minute after I was fascinated by the look of White Sea, I discovered Vivienne Westwood's Fall 2011 RTW collection. If I spot a third scary halloween look make-up then I'd say there might be a trend of horror going on.....

White Sea: Mountaineer

When I first saw Vivienne's collection for this season, I dropped my cupcake not for the usual unusual cuts and prints, beads and pleats, but for the hair and make-up artists. I know they couldn't be Sweeney Todd, but, Gee, is that a hell of a make-up or what, make-up from hell?

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Don't get me wrong though, I quite like them, and although they're too scary for a pretty everyday look, they'd be quite pretty for a scary halloween look.

Normally when I look at an interesting designing or art work, my mind would automatically switch to a wild brain-storming mode trying to figure out what inspires the designer, who or what are their muses. And I think I've found the answers to the following ones:

Black Swan for this:

And Field Runners for the following:
( I bet Vivienne herself might have been playing Field Runners in between her meetings and designer's blocks :P)

*** ***
credit: Runway pictures from the collection: all from Style.com
other pictures from Google

Book-100 Years of Fashion Illustration

Cally Beackman - 100 Years of Fashion Illustration

Having discovered Cally Beackman's "100 Years of Fashion Illustration" is like stumbling up a museum of fashion and art. The title might suggest a in-depth study on fashion illustration, it is indeed a chronicle of fashion, using illustrations as examples of particular styles, designers, times, and trends, . Little is discussed on illustration techniques, nor can you expect to learn the use of wash and tips on rendering. Instead, trends of different times and the stories concealed behind are thoroughly investigated. The figure-concealing tubular dresses of the early 20s, the feminine yet natural (that is, compared to the painful hour-glass silhouettes of earlier times) silhouettes of the 30s... this book not only spots the trends and demonstrates them using fashion illustrations, it goes one step further into investigating the reasons behind every trend. Why is a hemline longer, why is focus being put on the shoulders... And the reasons demonstrated lie somewhere beyond beauty and fashion itself. Be it the war, a shortage of fabric, or other major cultural, economic and technological changes in the society... It makes me rethink fashion as not only about visionary beauty and personal taste, but also a means of recording a bigger picture, the evolution of human society and civilisation. To this extend, fashion illustration itself serves as the pencils and papers of that record, but just like literature, fashion illustration's nature brings with it eternal imagination, romance, exaggeration, and the pursuit of perfection, which are indeed the paramount beauty of this genre of art. Therefore, despite of being a little disappointed not learning anything about fashion illustration, it was indeed a delight to read this book. After all, what is fashion illustration without fashion?

Scanned some of my fav pages from the book, hope this doesn't break any law...