Thursday, 26 April 2012

Back on track, or at least on my way to finding that track

Can't believe I've abandoned this place for a year and a 1/12...

Where do I start...? It's like nothing really happened yet everything's changed. It's like a long sleep in the castle only to be waken by my very self. Not a knight in a shiny armor, not a strike of lightening, not even a sweaty nightmare or a pain in the stomach - but my very own mind. Is that what they call an epiphany? I don't know, what I do know is that I've been settling for things I'm not that passionate about in the name of being a grown-up, while feeling so sick about the very idea of it that I ran away as hastily as I could.

And now here I am, in-between identities, in-between places, in-between relationships, in-between dreams. I wonder is it just me or are we all programmed to have to go through the exact same phase in life?

What I do know is, I've been waiting for what I call a chance - don't even know what for, a change? a shove forward? - for so long, that I tied my hands and knees to the point that I was frozen in time and space, so timid to go anywhere in fear of imperfection, yet so desperate to get the hell out of this daunting current state that I scream constantly in my head "All I want is a chance, anyone? anywhere? anything!"

I feel constantly a thousand words down my throat a million chills on my skin a trillion thoughts in my head a gazillion feelings in my eyes, so overwhelming that I'm stunned and and utterly motionless, on the edge of reaching that tipping point of explosion.

I know this is not right.

And I have to do something about it, come to my own rescue, be my own salvation.

So here I am again, selling all I have on eBay, running away from myself, looking for the new me.

Funny how the journey starts from Yorkshire though, a reality drawback of the stuff I could sell and train tickets I could afford.

I blame it on you, Ebay, but thank you nonetheless.

It feels so good to pack light, and yes I'm not just talking about the suitcase, but my head, too.

Saturday, 26 March 2011

fully packed

fully packed, not much could be packed into a 20kg suit case.

Off to London, bye bye UK.

I'll keep updating this blog once I've settled and received my iMac through the post, but it might take a while.

Until then,
Bye for now.

Friday, 18 March 2011

Illustration No.7 The Stretch

<The Stretch>
-another entry of my Red&Blue collection

A little overslept,
Lifted straight form the winter to a bold summer.
With the spring missing,
Got just enough time for a stretch.
Are you ready?


(click on the image for full view)

Thursday, 17 March 2011

Illustration No. 6-Lost in the woods, where the trees will guide you home.

lost internet connection for a week, here's what I've been doing, and thinking about.

<Lost in the Woods>

till the end of the road, 
where there is light, 
and there is hope.

(click on the image for full view)

Thursday, 10 March 2011

Sunday, 6 March 2011

2011 Fall RTW-Vivienne Westwood and the Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Remember in Fashion PR class my teacher used to say that, if you spot a neon wire decoration in major store window displays from more than three fashion cities, say, Milan, London, and Tokyo, at the same time, then there might be a trend in neon wire decorations going on for store window display decos.

A minute after I was fascinated by the look of White Sea, I discovered Vivienne Westwood's Fall 2011 RTW collection. If I spot a third scary halloween look make-up then I'd say there might be a trend of horror going on.....

White Sea: Mountaineer

When I first saw Vivienne's collection for this season, I dropped my cupcake not for the usual unusual cuts and prints, beads and pleats, but for the hair and make-up artists. I know they couldn't be Sweeney Todd, but, Gee, is that a hell of a make-up or what, make-up from hell?

Sweeney Todd: The Demon Barber of Fleet Street

Don't get me wrong though, I quite like them, and although they're too scary for a pretty everyday look, they'd be quite pretty for a scary halloween look.

Normally when I look at an interesting designing or art work, my mind would automatically switch to a wild brain-storming mode trying to figure out what inspires the designer, who or what are their muses. And I think I've found the answers to the following ones:

Black Swan for this:

And Field Runners for the following:
( I bet Vivienne herself might have been playing Field Runners in between her meetings and designer's blocks :P)

*** ***
credit: Runway pictures from the collection: all from
other pictures from Google

Saturday, 5 March 2011

Hyde Park with Blossoms and a Vintage Shop

We all know that every now and then one can come across some amazing finds in vintage shops. Or as Forest Gump puts it, life is a vintage shop, you never know what you're gonna get. A 30s midi dress, a 20s Singer sewing machine, or even an old pair of stockings used by Marilyn Monroe herself, with pics of her drunk in them as proof of authenticity. (wait, don't stockings look the same though?) Point is, in times like this when wearing last season's dresses is a crime but dresses from two seasons back is a, not even an ok, but a cry out of XXX-is back, or XXX is the new YYY, or a statement of a climate friendly fashion recycle, or a hint of vintage, mix-match, or even creativity, don't we all get a bit bored and tired? When fashion is pursued so literally, what's left for glossy new trends is as sad as those sale tags and piles of less fortunate clothes who didn't make it to someone's wardrobe, in time...

Well didn't meant for this to be so serious and critical, I guess the sudden guest appearance of a dark cloud outside my window is the one to blame.

So, what I wanna talk about, is actually my jolly visit to Hyde Park and the lovely little vintage boutique not far from there.

It's not spring yet, but girls are already having picnics in the park. A cozy knitted blanket and a basket of homemade cupcakes did the trick. I had so much fun taking these pictures, putting myself in the shoes of a paparazzi and lying down as an on-guard leopard. I guess the difference between a pro and a part-time paparazzi is that the former pretends to be shooting at a bush of flowers while actually ambushing a target, while the latter tries to shoot at a bush of flowers while accidentally records a scene.




Trees, trees, hundreds of them line up a wishful path... Will they green up by the belated soothing spring breeze?



Now, please allow me to finally talk about the vintage shop....

Haven't vintage shops gone creative these days? While having a massive collection of vintage clothes and costumes, the shop has got a corner for creative vintage clothes, where I found trench coat turned dress, dress turned bag, and rabbit turned hat. Well I confess, the last one I've just made it up. But wouldn't it be adorable if they do? ^^


Three not-so-good, no-one-will-really-miss shirts surely make a dress as interesting and inspirational as collars and sleeves could ever be. Is is pretty or is it a joke? The answer is indeed the definition of fashion. If you like it you like it, you hate it you hate it, you don't give a **** then you walk away and forget about it. The most important element is not the dress, not even how you look, but how you think and feel. It is you, you as a whole, and you alone.


I kinda grow to like the pink/ dark grey one, it gives off a sense of being hugged by a caring boyfriend from all the directions... Or we could also interpret the story as a naughty playful girl placing a practical joke on his bf's favorite shirts, making sure he gets the message: "You've got arms to hold me and hold me only. You'd better do so or else I'd be sad and lonely". Or the story could even go as creepy as a girl with a habit of tearing off his bf's shirts after break-ups, and collects them as reminders to herself, how a girl grows with little pieces of her past, or in this case, little pieces of exs' shirts... Haha, I could make a whole list of my wild imaginations provoked by this shirt, but I guess the most likely plain old boring truth might just be some vintage shop keeper having some experimental fun with a ten minute stitch job done. Nah, not so juicy and film-script-writing-worthy all of a sudden... ...

Then of course besides costumes and furnitures, what's a vintage shop without twinkle twinkle little jewelries? I wonder who they've been with, how many mileage they've traveled, what kind of moments they've witnessed, or what unsaid messages the givers tried to tell the receivers... ...
IMG_3626 -sw

My favorite in the shop: a pink armless chair looking as delicious as a lovely puffy cupcake, and a "while little tea set" so mini that they could make a good set of eggcups for quails.

Since this entry has been so girly already, I might as well share some quotes from Marilyn Monroe that I've read about the other day:

"I believe that everything happens for a reason. People change so that you can learn to let go, things go wrong so that you appreciate them when they're right, you believe lies so you eventually learn to trust no one but yourself, and sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together."

"Imperfection is beauty, madness is genius and it's better to be absolutely ridiculous than absolutely boring."

Before, I thought she's only talking to girls, but now I've convinced myself that she's also talking about the sleeve-collar shirt :P

"I'm selfish, impatient and a little insecure. I make mistakes, I am out of control and at times hard to handle. But if you can't handle me at my worst, then you sure as hell don't deserve me at my best."

It is yet another statement from Monroe, which I think is true about every girl, or should I say, there's a little piece of her in every one of us? The difference is the percentage. How many percent of Monroe are you made of?

jacket & skirt: River Island
jumper: Calvin Klein 
heels: Rocket Dog
bag: H&M